Ok, after a couple of beers... I have to bug you.
Skills used: developing valid (w3.org and 508 standards)
cross-browser HTML / cross-functional teams through wireframes
Seriously? No clue what you mean by "cross-functional teams through wireframes" even means. Your own home page has 13 errors. I stopped after your first row of designed sites, none of which validate. So where did you even find your "standards"... as none of those sites validate by w3.org/508 standards.
I realize you had no idea that I CODE, and am not a hiring MORON. Still, advertising experience with Dreamweaver is bad form. You can't do that AND advertise "standards", or didn't you know that? Oh, were you not aware that Adobe couldn't html their way out of a paper bag? Clearly, your 9+ years experince has taught you JACK SHIT.
Your Jr. High skills mean nothing to me. I'm glad you didn't join the site. I'd have hated to of put you in your place in front of other members. It's brand new and small for now. I'll be sure to alert admins that people like you exist and have no place here. If I were a hiring corporation, I'd have set fire to your resume on your porch.
All said, your graphics skills aren't bad. Had you only approached me advertising that skill instead of one you don't have, I'd have been interested. Thanks for not persuing anything.
Your favorite ex-interest for illegitimate income,
mr_coffee